Thursday, February 26, 2009

Naruto 437- Refrigerator-Stuffing no Jutsu!

OK, so Naruto 437 is out. As I indicated in my last post, I started picking up on spoilers this afternoon, and I've been waiting and seething all night. Completely put me off work, but that's what happens. I'll give you a calm, logical response, but you'll forgive me for indulging in a more visceral response right now. I warn you, I'm going to get pretty profane in this rant. Just so you know.


No. Hinata is Not. Fucking. Dead. We didn't see the body!
Naruto, I'm completely sympathetic with you going six-tails on Pain. You've got a wide-open space. Every single person in the village should know to get the fuck out. Just don't go too crazy because your girl is gonna be alive, goddamnit! You're both gonna be fine, and this manga's gonna have a happy ending that involves lots of little blonde-haired Hyuugas running around...


And Fuck you, Pain, Mr. My-Pain-Is-Worse-Than-Yours. Give me a fucking break. "Oh, God! My parents were killed in front of me! Now I am sad and emo and I've got a completely fucking retarded plan to take over the world!" Give me a goddamn break, kiddo. You sure as fuck didn't have it worse than either Naruto or Gaara. You were trained by Jiraya, and you had friends with you, for what looked like most of your life. One of them is probably sucking on that wrinkled
rasin you call a cock right now, and you're actively manipulating the other one's corpse you Fucking. Piece. Of shit. So don't give me any sort of bullshit about how your Pain is worse. You're a fucking cowardly bastard and I am going to thouroughly enjoy the next chapter, which is going to involve such a curbstomping on the part of the Kyuubi that it's going to functionally dissolve this body. And then once it's gone and you're all alone with your fucking little paper chick, Naruto is going to rip through her like she's made of...well, paper, and then, he is going to torture you. Slowly. And oh. so. painfully. Who knows, maybe he'll go ahead and kill that bitch in front of you, just like you TRIED, yes, I said TRIED to do to him. And it will be sweet. Oh so sweet.

*Ahem, ahem* Sorry for that. Needed to get it off my chest. So, Pain's immobilizing Naruto and trying to mess up his brain with stupid talk about "peace". Shikamaru's dad, a faceless ANBU*, Ino and her dad are off finding Pain, and Shika's stuck there because of his broken leg. Team Gai is heading back and sees Gamabunta (man, if he's dead, too...) so they know something's up. Unfortunately the premier Taijutsu team isn't going to be much use against gravityboy. Pain uses those weird black rods he's got to immobilize Naruto. Ma toad yells at him not to give up, and Pain just kills her. As he's doing this, Hinata, who had been watching and wating, attacks gravityboy all by her lonesome. Naruto tells her to get the fuck out, she's going to die, but she says, basically, "Yeah. I know. I want to do this. Because I love you." And with that, she attacks gravityboy. Who just Shinra Tenseis her into the ground, then apparently stabs her. I say apparently because we didn't see it on the page. Pain lobs a taunt at Naruto about how love leads to pain and some shit and compares it with his parents being killed. Naruto, completely understandably, flips the shit out. And now he's in six-tail mode with some weird skeleton thing around him. Pain comments "my pain is greater than yours"

Analysis-...well, not really much to say here. I am fucking pissed off at Kishimoto for making Hinata go in alone. I loved her character and shipped her with Naruto over Sakura. Hinata had like, zero time in the limelight over the course of the manga. She had the one fight with Neji and what, a few reaction shots? But through a combination of the anime writers really liking her, the incredible determination she showed, and the fact that she was something like the only character in the manga who gave a damn about Naruto before the series started endeared her to, basically, everyone in the US fandom. Plus she's just so damn cute! Also, if you take a look at her on this page here, I think you'll agree, pretty darn hot once the timeskip kicks in. Maybe it's just that I have a thing for long, dark hair. So I have always loved Hinata's character (she's not up there on my Perverse Sexual Lust list (It's really not as wrong as it sounds), but she'll make honorable mention**). I shipped her with Naruto over Sakura not because I dislike Sakura, but because I thought Hinata would fit with Naruto better romantically for one, and for two I really wanted her to get that happy ending. She didn't get much development onscreen, but that's hard to do when you get 50 or so pages dedicated to you in a 437 chapter manga. And we did see how just Naruto's example helped her to change. She wasn't scared. She wasn't nervous. She was standing up strong, protecting the dude she loves. And now she's apparently dead. Fuck. Kishimoto, you are a bad, bad man. Don't kill her. Please.

And to top it all off I've been reading Clannad After Story spoilers to make my cry like a little girl even more.

* Always Nearby Basically Useless


  1. Is it just me, or is Hinata's "death" scene seem rather...forced? Random? Just something about it doesn't feel right, in the literary sense. It's like she popped in there to "rescue" Naruto (even though she didn't really do anything, not even take out the things pinning Naruto into the ground), and then immediately got stuffed in the fridge.

    Damn, I guess Kishimoto just learned a new Ninjutsu: "Refrigerator-Stuffing Technique!"

  2. That functionally seems to be it. And I just may have to change the title of this post to reflect that.